Thanksgiving Thoughts

A quote from one of my favourite motivators, Zig Ziglar:  "Sometimes the most effective motivation is just to say "thank you.""

Image is from my favourite cartoon characters of all time --- Charlie Brown's Gang with dear Snoopy happily saying "Thank you."  

And to Charles Schulz (November 26, 1922 – February 12, 2000), creator of Snoopy, Charlie Brown and the Gang - from the bottom of our hearts - thank you - for all the wonderful years your insightful and heart-warming creations have showered us.

Mr. Schulz, you remain a favourite cartoonist for always.   

Pathway to Success

A day's reflection on the word 'success'

I'm not even going to define it, but this is my thought about success ... to forge our mighty visions and dreams though checkered by defeat... We need something to believe in, for which we give wholehearted enthusiasm. Like believing in success, until we find it.

Even those born with a silver spoon want to succeed at something, one way or another. The fact is, we are all struggling to succeed despite the differences in forces we individually apply through the strengths of our drives. Our lives are confronted with major and minor challenges that interfere with our path to success. Sometimes these challenges hinder us, but other times they encourage us when we see them as opportunities, a part of our growth and learning experience.


Everyone has his or her own thoughts about what success is. What is success to you?

Most likely have your own thoughts about your pathway to success. Newspapers, magazines and the internet are all full of it - success stories and testimonials. Almost everyday, we hear of people who started small business or an adventure with hardly any financial backings or other obvious advantages, but are simply courageous and have the persistence and dedication to pursue their dreams.

At the moment, here's my random thought I consider related to my success pathway ...   

My path forward is as certain as far as my commitment. I can only derive my strength, enthusiasm and motivation from God, especially when things are not what they seem and when times are so troubled. He did not promise skies always blue, but He did promise unfailing sympathy and undying love. With this in mind, I face my day to day challenges. And as I go through my own passage, I trust that I'll arrive at a proper destination, content and at peace.

Anxiety Attacks and Reality Acceptance

It's often been said, it's lonely to be a writer. I suppose. And then again, it's okay to be lonely as long as we have valid reasons and it doesn't persist too long.    

Having a writer's block?  There are always anxious moments. They sometimes overwhelm and we are rendered sleepless. Our confidence is at a stand still, and then if it vanishes, we think that all we have left feeling is uncertainty and perhaps fear of the unknown.

Because we live in time, we have the present, we don’t know the future.


I was talking to a fellow friend whose manuscript has been rejected once again, the fourth time around. Contrary to what we remind ourselves with, to "not sweat the small stuff"... to a budding writer, a manuscript rejection ceases to be a small stuff when it happens continuously especially when we rely mainly on writing for financial support.  Oh, to confront insecurity, instability, and loss of self-esteem.

What about those anxiety attacks that seem unfounded... when the moment grips us and we become anxious for no concrete reason.

When we grow anxious, we usually consciously or unconsciously imagine more of the negative things to come.  Our thoughts are grey, and grey turns murky at times. Not to mention the escalated darker hours.

Only when what we have imagined doesn’t happen that we are ecstatically relieved. Our composure returns. So does our confidence.

What do you do when you feel anxious, and can't honestly figure out exactly 'why'?   We all have our own solutions but aside, foremost, I refuse serious thinking.  I drop whatever I'm doing, go out for fresh air to get rid of cobwebs in my mind, "remember my favourite things, hum a favourite tune, and enjoy a cuppa.  

Carpe diem!

When procrastination lingers

No, this has nothing to do with what writers call a writer's "block." It's between 'doing it now' and that lingering 'tomorrow is another day.'

American inspirational writer Napoleon Hill (1883-1970), was one of the earliest advocates of personal development books. He is famous for his all-time bestseller Think and Grow Rich.

Hill was advisor to U.S. President Franklin Delano Roosevelt in the 1930s.  One of his best-known quotations is:  "What the mind can conceive and believe, it can achieve."  In other words, success is never far behind, with all the right attitude ... and to some, the added  "... with a little bit o' luck."

Here's a quote from Hill that has seen me through especially during my years as a college student:

"Do it now! can affect every phase of your life. It can help you do the things you should do but don't feel like doing. It can keep you from procrastinating when an unpleasant duty faces you. But it can also help you do those things that you want to do. It helps you seize those precious moments that, if lost, may be retrieve."  - Napoleon Hill, American Author, Personal Development Guru

True, we may not always be successful in what we aim for every time, but it's good to challenge procrastination. And ah, what a feeling when we score.

Having said that, I better get back to a writing deadline. 

Image Credit:
whywesuffernow.com (cropped)

Proper Perspective Helps

The past weeks have been one exhausting lump. Health challenges. Anxieties. Beating to-dos, some urgent while others unimportant, really.

Anxieties can blow life away. It's easy to overlook what the day offers when swamped by day to day stresses. And more, get distracted.  Proper perspective helps. Though we plan for the morrow, we need appreciate and enjoy today's blessings.



What important things that really matter do you need to do that you've been been putting off, simply because you think you're too busy to do? Actor and writer Sid Caesar reminds us:  "In between goals is a thing called life that has to be lived and enjoyed."


The good old saying is always handy, "Laughter is the best medicine." At least we can try...  it's a great absorber for life's rut and bumps and a happy heart makes our face cheerful.  There's something else about seasonality.

Poet John Keats once said: "There are four seasons in the mind of man." Besides, if it's winter in America, it's summer in Australia. It's always a challenge to start anything, but once we get going, the process becomes smooth. What's the 'season' in your life now?

Start your day with a smile to put back some energy into your life. Perhaps, encourage a dying ember. As a child, I've always loved sparklers. I found them more exciting than fireworks which come off stronger and more aggressive.

If memory doesn't fail me, just days after New Year about 5 years ago, I was invited to a friend's house and found that she had two lovely calendars displayed side by side. You know, the kind that display one page for each day, with a date in a large figure and few lines of print at the bottom.

I was being polite so I didn't say anything why she has two calendars together. My glances did not escape my smart friend. She of course smiled and said, "You're probably wondering why I have two of them. Have a closer look again, Tel. They're not the same."

True enough. I found out that the first calendar had "A Joke for Today" and the other "A Quote for the Day." A smile and a quote of encouragement.

What a lovely way to start a day!

Hope Does Wonders

We are familiar with that overly quoted:  hope springs eternal. And true too. As long as we have hope for success in getting out of a situation we are in, or worse, at the brink of almost giving up - somehow, we find courage to keep trying, and going, or moving on. 

Without hope, what chance could we hang on to? But with it, our hearts remain strong; it becomes our pal, our friend, when everything else fails.

I've kept in mind what Russian writer Dostoyevsky eloquently wrote from his famous classic novel Crime and Punishment:  "They wanted to speak, but could not; tears stood in their eyes. They were both pale and thin; but those sick pale faces were bright with the dawn of a new future, of a full resurrection into a new life. They were renewed by love; the heart of each held infinite sources of life for the heart of the other." - Fyodor Dostoevsky, Russian Novelist

When we are feeling depressed, we need to do something about it. Talk to someone we can trust. Email or phone call will do.  Not feeling like connecting with anyone or like no one else seems to care? Do something you love to do. Perhaps a self-treat, a bit of self-love to give you warmth and lighten your heavy heart.

Whatever brings us hope is a sure flicker of light, a little ray of sunshine.

Withdrawing to Regroup

Regroup and create space

Life is a gift. At the same time, reality has it that living is also a continuous challenge. Highs and lows. Ups and downs. Feeling depressed, depressed or anxious of what the future holds? Go, take a walk. Or, as a popular song goes, "when life is making you lonely, go downtown..."

Sometimes Murphy’s Law strikes its worse at our most vulnerable and least expected moments, that is, when trials seem more than enough.

Others lose faith. Some don’t. Others become numb.

Some of us withdraw temporarily or indefinitely, only to regroup. We stay silent for awhile.

When we do seek support and company, let it be from people who have kindness, a gentle and a sincere heart to offer. Somehow, face to face or through other forms of communication, we can feel these attitudes during our most down moments.

Come to think of it, I’m reminded of pine cones. When they fall off the pine trees, they are sealed tight so the seeds inside can’t get out. What happens? The fallen pine cones lie on the forest floor - sometimes for long years … until a forest fire carries it through. The seal is melted by the unforgiving, cruel and unfeeling fire. But the seed inside fall out and eventually grow.

Accepting our Limitations Amid Upsets

How's it going?

It's almost the end of the second quarter 2014. For those who wrote down their New Year's resolutions, how're you doing? While some of us are "just" fine, others are anxious, worried, sleepless. Some continue to suffer from physical pain.

You may be fine but there are those on the verge of bankruptcy with families to feed, with bad debts, with credit cards over the limits. I'm thinking of people trying to make ends meet, those who, no matter how they try can't simply find a job, those who have just lost their jobs, those who recently lost their homes, those who are ill and alone, and those who are simply hurting.   You are not alone. 

Meantime, let's re-group. Take a deep breath...  

• We can only do as much. Let's take a rest in between our labours instead of pushing beyond what we can handle. At least a brief respite before deciding what to do.

• We need to remind ourselves we are limited in terms of energy and time. If you believe in God like I do, can pray for more strength and rely on his promise never to leave us in times of trouble.

• When we push ourselves beyond our human limits, our bad moods surface. I know. I even get cranky and take it on the computer. Others take it on their kids or their partners. When this happens, it's telling us that we need rest from our overwork or high anxieties.

When we were young, we needed naps. We had lots of naps. Somehow, we have forgotten this "right" as we grow older. Once we give ourselves that gift of rest, nap, or whatever you call it, we give ourselves the best of us again, fully functioning. Refreshed.

Thinking Well and Being Well

Former American President Abraham Lincoln once said,  "Most folks are about as happy as they make up their minds to be."

Sometimes we find ourselves stuck thinking of a not-so-positive thought.  Or at times no matter how we try to be "cool," some people just rub us off the not-too-nice way. Perhaps a poor customer service from a bank teller or a rude department store sales person. Or just a nasty person who bumps us on a sidewalk with no apologies. From these displeasures, we decide: to stop the nagging thought or not. 

Remember the "The Sound of Music" of Rodgers and Hammerstein?  We can take Maria’s advice:  to think of our favourite things. And then we won’t feel so bad. Does this work enough for you? 

There's always a danger of one negative pebble bumping into another, then another, rolling and slamming into another, to our detriment. It's not always easy but if we try real hard, we’ll shake loose those nagging unpleasant thoughts which can lead to stress if we're not careful.

What to do? Do something different to deviate yourself from thinking about it. Perhaps listen to your favourite music, drift to the shops or your favourite bookstores, and have a cup of coffee. 

On Writing and Being a Writer

I've been thinking on what to write. Got to my drafts and other parchments, doodles and all that. Then while cleaning up one of my online folders, I dawned on one of these posts that exactly summed up what's been in my thoughts. It's written by a good friend, Wendi, from my early years online. She's a gifted writer and editor. Here's her insights on being a writer:

Being a writer is not about having an abundance of too-big-to-use words found in a dictionary.

Being a writer is not about knowing where to put a comma or a hyphen.

Being a writer is not about properly formatting what you've written to fit somebody else's standards.

Being a writer is not about being published.

Being a writer is not about fame or fortune.


Being a writer is not about being able to lace together a few choice words with elegant style.

Being a writer is more than being able to write two poems and half a romance novel.

Being a writer is more than having raw talent.

Being a writer is dedication first and foremost to the best sense of self one can find. How does one find that distant sense of self?

By writing their way directly into the core of the ugliest, most difficult to face parts of themselves; turning it inside out, wiping it off with a sponge, hanging it out to dry in a cool spring breeze, refreshing it with a coat of creativity, then wearing it again with pride.

Being a writer is about soul-diving, finding vacant lots and filling them up; finding wounds and discovering ways to heal them. Writing is about free falling into the all that is within you...... with your eyes open, knowing that there's nothing to hold on to but yourself and your dreams.

Being a writer is not an occupation, it's a way of life.

Being a writer is seeing a "for sale" sign on an old abandoned house and visualizing in an instant the characters who occupied it, where they went, why they left and what each trait of each character in that house would have been, had you been there to witness that life. Being a writer is being able to stare rejection in the face and say, "That's okay. I knew you were comin', I can wait 'til I'm ready. It's not personal."...... and then crying in bed for two days wondering why you weren't good enough to be accepted.

Being a writer is about waking up in the middle of the night with a half thought in mid-flight out of no where heading towards unknown destinations; but stopping long enough to nag you out of bed to get a pen; and keep you up 'til it's finished exhausting it's purpose for waking you, whatever that may be.

Being a writer is about staring at blank pieces of paper wondering where the first drop of ink is going to come from or lead to. Being a writer is about being honest, real, open, aware and raw. You can always spell check and have what you've written corrected grammatically.

Being a writer is a gift. But to write something that is clear, you must be clear about what it is you're writing.

(Many thanks, Wendi. I love your sentiments, fresh as yesterday. T.) 

Beloved Infidel

Film Soundtrack 

Soundtrack from the 1959 film Beloved Infidel starring Gregory Peck (F. Scott Fitzgerald) and Deborah Kerr (Sheilah Graham)




Video Credit:
Beloved Infidel. YouTube, uploaded by Samar Elsaadany. Accessed April 2, 2014. Performed by Aileen Wilson, with Franz Waxman conducting the 20th Century Fox Symphony Orchestra.



(c) 2014. Tel Asiado.  Leaves from my Musings. All rights reserved.  

Love and hope, again

Flipping through one of my writing journals, I came by this quote from Dostoevsky. For anyone familiar with his classic novel Crime and Punishment, I thought this quote is a powerful one.

"They wanted to speak, but could not; tears stood in their eyes. They were both pale and thin;  but those sick pale faces were bright with the dawn of a new future, of a full resurrection into a new life.
  They were renewed by love; the heart of each held infinite sources of life for the heart of the other." ~ Fyodor Dostoevsky

Crime and Punishment focuses on the mental anguish and moral dilemmas of an impoverished former student in St. Petersburg, Rodion Romanovich Raskolnikov. In dire need of cash, he formulates and executes a plan to kill an unscrupulous pawnbroker. He argues that with the pawnbroker's money he can perform good deeds to counterbalance the crime, while ridding the world of a worthless vermin. He also commits this murder to test his own hypothesis that some people are naturally capable of such things, and even have the right to do them. Throughout the novel, Raskolnikov justifies his actions by connecting himself mentally with Emperor Napoleon Bonaparte, as he believes that murder is permissible in pursuit of a higher purpose.

Fulghum Kindergarten Rules

We've all gone through kindergarten years.  Those were the days, my friend...

Kindergarten years, one of the happiest in our lives. Well, mine was. How about yours? One of my favourite books by Robert Fulghum is All I needed to know I Learned in Kindergarten. I occasionally revisit to read his great advice on how to live and be ... handy for all seasons. Meant to be for kids, but as adults, we still can learn from.

• Clean up your own mess.
• Don't hit people.
• Don't take things that aren't yours.
• Flush.
• Play fair.
• Put things back where you found them.
  
• Say you're sorry when you hurt somebody.
• Share.
• Wash your hands before you eat.
• Watch out for traffic, hold hands and stick together.

On reflection, every child needs a sense of belonging, to feel accepted and be recognized, aside from feeling safe and secure.   

I must love the book so much; I recently found out in my bookshelves that I have two copies. 

Through the Eyes of a Child

"See the glory of a rose ... through the wide eyes of a child." 


A child's laughter is so innocuous, yet infectious. Don't we love it all. We must learn to laugh like them, sometimes even cry like them (but n more tantrums, as we have matured in years)  We can learn to be happy like them, even feel like them. It's wonderful to laugh and be child-like once in a while, and to keep that inner peace and warmth through the eyes of a child.

Earlier, whilst musing on a cool Sunday morning, a carefree lorikeet gently distracted my attention as it perched on my balcony.

Soon, so many lovely children came to mind, the most recent are Samantha and Chloe, six and four. Then Jamie came to mind, a lovable boy, son of a friend. If my recollection is right, he was about six years old then. He's 12 now. 

One day he came home from school with rosy cheeks.

"Mum, I think I'm getting married," he excitedly announced to his mother.
"What makes you think that?" replied my friend, his mother dear.
"Well, I was in the playground today and Nikki came and kissed me."

The image I've chosen to attach here is that of Her Majesty, QEII. I've always loved this picture of her. Who would ever think that this three-year old lovely child would one day be Queen.

And then again, as children, we are all beautiful in the eyes of our parents.

Thanks to Youtube, I found the song I was looking for, "Through the Eyes of a Child" and Percy Faith's music remains as soothing and easy listening as ever.






Through the Eyes of a Child 

By Percy Faith & Female Chorus 

Music by: Émile Stern 

Lyrics by: Eddy Marnay

The wide eyes of a child look upon a world reborn 

See the glory of a rose that never bears a thorn.

The wide eyes of a child can invent a laughing moon 

And the orange sun leaps high just as a floating toy balloon .

He clearly sees the flower and the bird 

Whose thoughts he knows likely any word 

And any child can hear ringing laughter from a stream 

Hear the music of the heart to us a half-forgotten dream.

(In sleep he hears the star's distant song 

Oh, may its wonder last for his whole life long) 

If we had vision too as we stumble on our ways 

We could sometimes see our days

as through the eyes of a child.

(Thanks to Japanese1970 & aguschina78)


Video Credit:

Through the Eyes of a Child. Percy Faith and Female chorus. Youtube uploaded by Jokarilon. Accessed 1 March 2014.         


Image Credit:

Her Majesty, Queen Elizabeth II, aged 3. en.wikipedia.org. Public Domain.


(c) March 3, 2014.  Tel. Leaves from my Musings. All rights reserved. 

Practice of Patience

The word 'patience' has been a challenge where action is spot on.

I remember one of my childhood friends who lives on the other side of the world from where I am. She miscalculated the time zone conversion. I picked up the phone at 03.08 with my brain still asleep. She thought it’s 08.08 in the morning where I live. My eyes had difficulty opening as I waded through the wee hours on a self-imposed writing deadline, but the excitement of talking to her got the better of me since we haven’t heard from each other for a while.

At one point, our talk drifted to this word 'patience.'  A challenge for both of us, we admitted.

Career, relationships or the lack of it, family life, and future angst, they all require patience… and at times, add to these, loneliness and recurring grief, even when we think we have healed.


Life is simply that - full of ups and downs, a roller coaster, bumps and scrapes - emotionally, physically, and to some of us, include spiritually.

But in our search for harmony and peace, we have to keep reminding ourselves that we will never be able to escape life challenges.

We need patience. At times a lot.  I love what Anne Morrow Lindbergh said, and I quote,

"Only with winter-patience can we bring the deep desired, long-awaited spring."

 How is your patience today? Believe me, I'm trying to do something about mine.

I'm Lovable, You're Lovable

It's love wellness:  I'm lovable, you're lovable

Even if "falling in love" is acknowledged and attributed to the one who loves us, we should not fail to recognize or take for granted our own lovableness.

How we treat "falling in love" is important. Sometimes, it may even be a dis-ease. A careless or rush decision can cause a painful love sickness that may prevent the development of an enduring love or "opening to love."

As we grow up, we build walls around our hearts to protect our true feelings from fear of being hurt or rejected. What are these walls? We can easily identify some of them from experience – restrained actions, controlled feelings, numbed senses, cautious thoughts, timid glances, hypochondria, and if I may add, too much refined behaviors.


Then we meet someone "special." Suddenly, the wall protecting our tender heart begins to tumble down. We open up. We break our silence. To borrow a phrase from Camelot: "We flung wide our prison doors!" We enter then fall into the presence of love. Because this experience of falling in love is activated magically by another person, we attribute the source of love only to that person.

When we attribute that experience of our love only to the presence of the other person, there may be a tendency to overlook or recognize our own love-worth or lovableness. As we become dependent on another for our sense of worth we might overlook our own perceptions of ourselves and lose discovery of our own value, something that can only be measured by our own perception.

When we understand that the love we see reflected in another's acceptance is recognition of who we really are, we begin to accept that we are truly loved, and we feel lovable. As we listen to the ones we love with their deepest feelings and needs, they too will feel loved and be lovable.

Serenity to Accept Things We Cannot Change

Accepting Things We Cannot Change

Reflecting on a famous quotation by Reinhold Niebuhr:

“God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change…”

Some things just are. I’m talking about things we simply cannot change. If we spend days of our lives endlessly trying to change them, we only get frustrated, hurt and disillusioned.

We wish we have a big house and a happy home. We wish we have lots of money so we don’t need to worry about our piling up monthly bills to pay. We wish we have 10 booksellers to our credit. A lot more wishes...

Well, we just happen to be who we are.

We can only try to do the best we can. But when we sit around whingeing and whining about what we don’t have and compare ourselves with others, we find ourselves dragged on into an unhealthy and sometimes destructive mode.

Difficult as it may, we have to do something about it, then our circumstances may still cease to be burdens, with knowledge and acceptance that we have no power to change, rather, accept as facts of life we need to put up with.

Do we move on beyond anything we cannot change?

Patience and the Background Performers

Extras in Films, TV and Commercials

A lesson in patience

They are 'background performers' more popularly called extras.  To be an 'extra' requires loads of patience. Often, they have to wait for long hours before the second or third line director calls for a shooting time.  Rolling... Ready.  Action.

The waiting is maybe 90 to 95 percent of the time. There's a lot of standing up or sitting down talking to fellow extras also waiting for a cue. Otherwise, once called to act, extras do their best and listen to what they're instructed to do carefully.

Extras are often considered a low job to do. With the minimum wage pay per hour, they are exposed to all the natural elements. Calls can start in the early hours of the morning until midnight. They just have to be prepared. Depending on the director's wishes, takes (re-takes) can be few to lots. As an extra one has to be really observant about timing and continuity of the shoot.


One good thing is, extras learn to bond together and form friendships with the others. The group is extremely diverse in age, vocations or careers. Ages can start from a child of 3 or 4 to the elderly. There's a cross-section of society. Some extras are retirees out to enjoy life, the unemployed, the students wanting extra monies when out of the classrooms, and about anyone of differing lifestyles - young and old - regardless of reason to be.

Extras in films are often well taken-care of with great food and they get to meet popular film stars, occasionally. Well, things may have improved in recent years, but you get the idea.  Whichever way they are placed, extras play an important part in films or television, and commercials too.

Come to think of it, a writer needs a load of patience and perseverance, especially when the muse isn't in the mood to write...

Proiginally published Sept 25, 2008 

Of Dreams and Realities

Carl Gustav Jung Quotes of Dreams and Being Awake

Somethings worth reflecting and acting upon where necessary.

• "Who looks outside, dreams; who looks inside, awakes."
• "Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves."
•  "Follow that will and that way which experience confirms to be your own."
• "If one does not understand a person, one tends to regard him as a fool."
• "Knowing your own darkness is the best method for dealing with the darkness of other people."

Carl Gustav Jung 91875-1961), was a Swiss psychiatrist and founder of analytical psychology. He broke off his professional relationship with Sigmund Freud after working with the latter to found his own school, which is analytic psychology.For many years Jung investigated about the human personality, especially the spiritual and unconscious aspects. He identified introversion and extroversion as basic personality types and stressed the importance of personal self-discovery for a healthy personality development.

Loneliness Blues

Although what others do to us can make us lonely sometimes, loneliness is something inside of us. We can be alone but not lonely, instead, enjoy our solo moments – listening to our favourite music, drifting to our favourite beaches, visiting our local library or bookstores reading our favourite author’s current bestseller, or simply watching an exciting TV show in the comfort of our living room.

Loneliness is when we feel as if nobody cares or wants to be with us.

Sometimes when we are lonely or feel lonely, we ignore what others say or do if it disagrees with what we think is true.

When loneliness creeps in, as occasionally it will, perhaps we should turn inwards and be a healthy company to ourselves. I know ... it is easier said than done.

We can make ourselves busy by doing some things we love to do.  Before we know it, our loneliness is dispelled, we can even forget why we feel lonely in the first place.

For now, it's really that occasional loneliness blues ... that part of life that has to be faced.